In the Holding Cell

We are still in Children's downtown, and Sarah is still in isolation until the pathology comes back to see if she is chickenpox free. The negative pressure isolation room opened up on the Oncology Ward, so we have been moved to a wonderful, new room with a great view of downtown. It has done wonders to lift our spirits. There have been a few traumatic events during this stay, and we are still learning the truth that "it is not the easy or contented life that makes folk hunger hard after the Lord Jesus." Even so, it is hard to surrender my mother's desire for my child to be comfortable and at ease. But we continue to help point Sarah's little heart to God even as we struggle at times. Most of the time it seems Sarah's heart is the one so near to God as He draws her throughout this journey. Faith like a child is so wonderful to watch.

One the pathology report comes back clean, Sarah will get more chemo today. This is the medicine that makes Sarah pretty sick for awhile. We pray she is able to see Hannah in her big stage debut on Wednesday.

Thank you for all of your prayers and encouragement.

Building Endurance

Wow! what a day!
Ok, a little before 8am, Sarah and I read the following verses: James 1: 2 Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.(NLT)
Sarah and I thought God really wanted us to be perfect and complete with all of the trials we are facing.

At 8am Sarah had her first ride in an ambulance. It was not just a regular ambulance but one that was specifically for kids. She had a flat screen to watch a movie as we drove to the other hospital. She loved it!

As the time neared for the biospy, we were tested again because the doctor was delayed almost 2 hours. Then the surgery lasted over 2 hours. I read to Anne a verse from Isaiah 26: 3 You (God) will keep in perfect peace
all who trust in you,
all whose thoughts are fixed on you!
4 Trust in the Lord always,
for the Lord God is the eternal Rock. (NLT)

Ok, I know you are waiting. Our God was merciful and the tumor is BENIGN! - not cancer! With all that is going on, this is such a needed encouragement. It is still a nasty tumor that will require us to see the specialist every three months for two to three years to make sure it does not come back. The major problem is it developed on her growth plate which could cause her finger to not grow correctly. (She now has her first cast.)

After Sarah woke up, they transfered her back to downtown. Anne is with her tonight. She will probably be in the hospital until Monday or Tuesday until the biospy of the bumps prove it is not chicken pox. So this weekend Anne and I will switch out.

In all of this, I am reminded what a wonderful best friend I have. A wife is truly a blessing and a gift from God. Days like today draw me more in love with my amazing wife. Over 80% of marriages end in divorce for parents with children with a serious illness. The reason is there is not a middle ground. You either come together or you grow apart. Thank God for using the Spirit to draw us together and even give us a few laughs as we waited on pins and needles for the doctor to give us the results. Anne was sweet to try to get my mind off of the situation by telling about the Amish fiction novels she is reading. Then the nurse took us to a consultation room and it was not very big and I started feeling dizzy. She made sure I opened the door and moved my chair close to the hall so I would not pass out. (I do not like small spaces especially as high as my blood pressure was!) I know these are not huge things, but they are times we share. I could not imagine going through this without my best friend and wonderful bride. So tonight we praise God for his answer to prayers, and we thank God for our marriage, our children and most of all His grace to trust Him with the future.

Admitted Downtown

Sarah was admitted downtown today since she developed about 20 red spots on her upper legs. No one is able to be sure of what it is, so they are being cautious since it could be chickenpox, which would not be good for her condition. It could be other viruses as well or another type of infection. they did a biopsy today and cut out two of the raised red spots to see what it is, but that takes 24 hours. We are still hoping to get the biopsy done on her hand tomorrow at 10am (which was already scheduled at the Legacy location so she might have her first ambulance ride up there and then back down to Dallas). This biopsy will require putting her out. She isn't so upset about that now since they didn't put her out to cut off the two bumps today. But she did so very well with minimal tears. She is just so strong.

Sarah is getting a bit down though just having to endure yet another setback. Even in the midst, we are seeing God's hand. Yesterday we got a few phone calls and somehow ended up with a few meals brought over in one day. And with one of the meals, there was some cash in an envelope. Now I understand why that happened - since we will be in the downtown hospital for several days now and Jay and I will be trading off being there, and Jay's parents are here to help out. So the meals will cover those days. Also, we had to pay tolls and parking and food and such today since we first has to go to the Legacy Children's hospital and then downtown to Dallas Children's hospital. Now we know why God sent the money, too! Thank you all for your faithfulness and service.

(Although next time several meals and some money come in at one time, we might just go ahead and pack a hospital bag!)

Another Change

We went to the hospital today to have Sarah's chemo and start her week of steroids and also to see her regular cancer doctor back from vacation. Dr. Appell came in to the room saying how she goes on a vacation for the first time in 1.5 years and Sarah goes to the ER twice, gets hospitalized, and gets a bone tumor. She said she was never going on vacation again. She was glad to be back and really made us feel at ease with how she took the reigns aggressively and wanted to speed up the process. So, we didn't end up getting chemo today or steroids since whatever the tumor turns out to be will affect how we proceed. So she is trying to get the biopsy/surgery moved up to tomorrow or Friday. And Sarah might have to be admitted just to be able to be ready at any time to go into the OR when there is a spot. We are waiting to hear back today from Dr. Appell. She feels fine with delaying Sarah's treatment a couple of days, but not for much longer, so that is why everything is rushed.

We will let you know how everything unfolds.

Also, some of you have asked about our Care Calendar and here is how you can find it and log on.

http://www.carecalendar.org/

The logon info is ID # 34875; Security code: 5891

Thank you for your continued prayers and encouragement - which, I know, sounds so cliche. But I can't imagine this journey without it!

More Information

Through God's wonderful grace and mercy, we were able to see the bone tumor specialist today. With yesterday being a holiday, it was going to be hard with referrals, etc. for the insurance, but everything worked out for us to go to the appointment.

It looks like they will perform the biopsy on June 14th. This is the only new information. The specialist said the same thing as the other doctor from this weekend so nothing new on the issue. They have to wait until Sarah finishes her 7 days of steroids that she starts tomorrow, and then wait a few days to get them out of her system. They will do the biopsy, and then if it is benign, they will cut the tumor out and repair the hole. If it is malignant, then the cancer doctors will determine what steps to take.

Please pray that the new nausea medicine works as she has chemo again tomorrow. We don't want to be back in the hospital with dehydration again, so she has to be able to keep liquids/foods down.

God has been filling us with strength and peace. We were actually having fun at the doctor's office today. It is great to see Sarah getting her strength back, and she had fun playing with her mama and daddy. She has also received an extra dose of happiness with her grandmama and granddaddy coming to stay with us. Jesus' love truly does endure forever and ever.

At Home for Five Hours

One of the favorite movies for Sarah and Hannah is Pollyanna. In the movie, the little girl Pollyanna teaches everyone the true meaning of thankfulness by bringing out the good in all situations. We are having to copy Pollyanna's attitude by trying to think of what we need to be thankful for because we are a good bit tired and discouraged.

Sarah was discharged from the hospital today at 2pm. We were finally all home and everyone was exhausted so we had long naps. Sarah woke up at 5 and she was running a fever. So in five short hours we are back at the hospital (emergency room). Hopefully we will go home soon once she finishes her antibiotics, but we are still concerned that this virus/cold/infection keeps rearing it's ugly head. They are doing more test tonight and hopefully something will show.

As far as her finger, we are going to see a tumor specialist on Tuesday. He is working with an orthopedic doctor and he will talk to us on Tuesday and plan the biopsy later this week or early next week. None of the doctors are confident they have seen this type of tumor/lesion before and so they are not making any commitments. I've been praying that God bring us new mercies each day with encouragement through the doctor's words and we have felt that. All of the doctors do not believe it is a new type of bone cancer. (the worst case scenario) The tumor specialist and orthopedic doctor both feel it is a benign tumor that is more aggressive than others. (best case scenario). The test to our faith is they are not ruling out the a rare, really unprecedented possibility that the leukemia has come back in this type of bone tumor. Our Heavenly Father gave us encouragement with this issue with our hematologist doctor in the hospital taking us through her blood counts to show us that nothing is really showing a relapse. Of course, we will not know until we go for the biopsy.

We ask you to continue to remember Sarah as she will have another treatment on Wednesday, start steroids and then have this biopsy. Even if it is a benign tumor the removal will be pretty hard surgery to make sure her finger continues to grow correctly. So we sit at the emergency room remembering we are to be thankful in all circumstances and as we look to the glory of Christ who has felt pain as a human and as Hebrews tells us that understands our pain, we find thankfulness.

I am exhausted so hopefully I did not ramble too much. Anne will read this and edit it soon. :)

First Hospital Stay on This Side of the Ocean

When we went in to the clinic today to follow up on the ER visit, Sarah had some signs of dehydration and she was still vomiting quite a bit, so they decided to admit her after the MRI was finished. She did great in the MRI which turned out to be over an hour. Jay stayed in the room with her at her head as she was in the tube with earphones on listening to her music. We had thought there would be a movie to watch, but there was only music. Jay said she was so brave and did everything she was asked to do even though she started off a bit teary-eyed.

Then around 5pm, she was admitted to the hospital. The good news is that her heart rate is already coming down as she is getting fluids, but she is still vomiting. If we get that under control, she should be able to go home tomorrow. A fellow mom who has a son with Leukemia recommended a new anti-nausea drug to me and they are trying it out now to see if it works for Sarah.

The bad news is that the MRI did show that she has some sort of tumor. Although this news is hard to hear and threatens to steal our hope and trust, we are still by God's mercy able to persevere at this time and continue to look to Him and no where else. Pray that He holds us in that place.

Tomorrow the bone doctors will come by and check out how they will biopsy her hand (take a piece of it out to test it) so we can see if it is malignant cancer or benign. The doctors seem to think there is more of a likelihood that it will be benign and something that would just require surgery and some recovery and that's it. There is a chance it could be the Leukemia or another cancer, but both of those would be very rare.

I am still able to pray in hope that it is not cancer and that this test of our faith will soon pass.

Thank you all for praying.