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Wednesday, April 21, 2010





Sarah woke up from a nap yesterday with a handful of hair to give me, which is actually a somewhat normal occurrence around here. But she was more upset than usual saying that her head was itchy all the time and her hair was stringy and felt dirty. She had asked to shave it before but I put it off. Now she was determined. So since we needed to go to the Survival Gal Salon anyway to have Sarah's wig thinned and fitted, I called to see if they could also shave her head. They said they could do everything we needed and could take her in an hour. I was nervous getting us all in the car and nervous all the way there. I just couldn't come to terms with it all. When we pulled up to the salon, I realized that Hannah hadn't put any pants on, which I told her to do, after her nap. So we arrive with one emotional mama, one hungry baby (I had to wake Rebekah up to make the appointment and didn't have time to feed her yet), one child with no pants and one child determined to get her head shaved!
Sarah wanted to look at first as the lady started to shave it, but quickly decided that was too scary and so turned around and held me hand the entire time. Afterwards, it took her quite a while to get comfortable with having a totally bald head. She still isn't liking it all the time, but she said that she really didn't have a choice since it was almost gone anyway and it felt itchy and stringy. She also got her wig fixed and purchased a pink sparkly scarf head covering.
I was successful in holding it together in the salon and even in the car from the girls' point of view anyway since they were in the back and my tear face was looking forward. I have teared up a few times since then and the flood gates have threatened to open, but I still haven't had the opportunity to fully let out my feelings.
Sarah had her spinal tap today along with her IV drip chemo and injection chemo. She did so well. She didn't even flinch this time when they had to draw blood from her arm. I was so proud of her. Her counts remain good - 1900 ANC, 123 liver.
It took her a little longer to wake up this time from anesthesia so I had more time than usual to sit beside her bed and rub her now bald head as she was unconscious and hooked to lots of beeping machines. I did cry a bit then, but still remained mostly composed as the nurse was still monitoring Sarah's vitals.
Thank you all for your continued care for us. It would be a much lonelier road without you. Thank you.




10 comments:

Corrie said...

What a brave little girl. I swear she learned it from her mother! But I do confess I want to cry with you as I read the account.

Although I have to admit, the mother of 3 in me laughed at the scene you described arriving at the salon. And that is how you survive I think.

Praying for you all every day.
Corrie

Sue and Robert Stark said...

Ditto to Corrie...well said. :) Although I'm not a mother to 3, only to 1...and I see how easily that salon account could happen. lol.

No more itchies and stinginess and feeling dirty!! I like both the scarf and her wig. Cute!! :)

Praying for you,
xxxx
Sue :)

Donna B said...

Anne,

Please tell Sarah that I think she is the prettiest little bald-headed girl that I've ever seen! I like the scarf also. I can't imagine what she must be going through on the inside but to see her smiling on the outside is such a blessing to see. I am so proud of her for trying to remain strong. Just know that Jesus is there with you all and He will continue to hold her in His arms to get her through all of this and will also continue to carry you and Jay at times when you feel as though you can't make it on your own. We love you all! Give the kids a hug and kiss from us please. Love, Donna Sue

Tina Coleman said...

While I can't even begin to imagine what you all are going through I want you to know that I am lifting you up in prayer! This brought tears to my eyes--bless her heart--so many things changing. But then I had to laugh at the scene at the salon--just hang in there and know that you have lots of people praying for all of you as you walk this unfamiliar road! God holds you in the palm of His hands and He loves you all dearly! And I think at some point you can give yourself permission to just let go and cry. But I do understand that you have to hold it together so you don't fall completely apart! My mama heart breaks for you!
Love and prayers,

Tina

Claire said...

Just wanted to say I think Sarah looks beautiful with her new scarf and wig. Just gorgeous. We are continually praying for you guys. Sending love across the seas to you all. I hope that Rebekah is going ok too healthwise.. and that Hannah has found some pants :) Lots of love, Claire xo

Anonymous said...

We are with you Sarah.....


Toby, Chie, Andy and Luis Gatchalian

Anonymous said...

Have to agree...she looks gorgeous. Aching for your mummy heart though.
xo tess

The Chung Family said...

Anne, you had me smiling and crying as I could totally picture you and your girls. Thank you for allowing us to share your journey of faith. God is your strength and He blessed you and Sarah with indescribable inner beauty and courage. The outward beauty that you both possess is an added bonus, like the cherry on the top!

goodknightfairmaiden said...

hi isla here
welcome to the states.
one of my friends had leukemia and now she is better.her name is Courtney and she really likes the monkey bars.hope we get to see you again and we can do monkey bars together too!!!!!!

love:isla

Psalm112 said...

Not sure if it would bring her any encouragement, but I had to shave my head, too. I had brain surgery. We had a hair cutting party and donated my hair to Children with Hairloss. Then, we shaved my head. If you go to the blog: welcometothefoxhole.blogspot.com and scroll down the right side of the page, there is a link for Buzzfest 2008. She can watch me shave my head, too! There are also a lot of pictures throughout the blog of my hair as it started to grow back...Also, my hubby is a Lymphoma survivor!!
We would still love to meet y'all.

because of HIM,

Meredith

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