Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Haircut Day

Sarah had her hair cut tonight. We have been talking about the fact that her hair will fall out and that it would be easier if it wasn't so long. Also, we have talked about donating it to Locks of Love where they make wigs for other children with cancer. Sarah was excited to be helping someone else and she thought it was funny that God would use her head to grow hair that he planned to give to another child who didn't have any.
A dear friend connected us with a local hairdresser who agreed to come to our apartment since Sarah's immune system is still so low. The hairdresser was a wonderful Christian lady who made Sarah feel beautiful and special. Sarah did such a good job being strong and brave through it all. And only at the end did her eyes drop and her face fell with tears coming down. She was grieving the long hair she'd lost.
I reminded her of the great service she is doing for another child who will be able to have hair beautiful hair and that helped her smile somewhat. Sarah is really becoming such a servant in our family. She wants to set the table and plan the meals and make as much as she can. She is making bead jewelry for everyone and she has started a recipe box with recipes she is writing that are allowed for cancer patients on strict diets. She wants to make a cookbook.
We have been at the hospital yesterday and today for the regular chemo appointments, but they said we need to come back tomorrow to check Sarah's central line (the tube going into her heart where they connect the IV) because it looks like it might be infected. Sarah isn't very happy about going to the hospital three days in a row.
She does get down at times as this process continues on and on and as she realizes more about what it means to have cancer. It has been hard for me to even say the 'c' word. I still can't allow myself to fully take it in for fear that I won't be able to recover from the sadness. I have learned by experience now that God really never leaves you even if you aren't working very diligently to stay by Him. It shows me that it hasn't ever been me at all but He is the one who all along has done all of the holding on and the staying close and the drawing near.


Shannon and Brett Hilliard said...

What a beautiful post. I was blessed by reading the realness. Praying for you all daily. Brett

Koop Tribe said...

What a beautiful girl you have inside and out! We will be praying that there wouldn't be any infection in her central line! It is a little cliche, but after I read you post I looked up at our wall where the Footprints in the Sand poem hangs. Obviously who ever wrote that knows of what you shared as well. We will continue to lift you all up.
Tell Sarah she looks so beautiful, and now her and Feshya's hair is the same length.

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